December 30, 2012

Numbness Continues

I don't think amending laws will make much difference to any of this. Law comes into picture only when an incident of deserving proportion takes place and there is no practical way in which we can stop incidents, small or big, from occurring. It is not easy to keep track of every woman and every lane she passes by. I don't even think it's easy to change what has been instilled for ages in this society. It is not easy to change the mindset of people, men and women alike. Why talk about society as a separate entity, when I hear similar thoughts expressed by people around me - people I have known for decades - and there is nothing I can do to convince them into accepting the fact that there is a need to change the way people think and behave. It is because we, the people, make the society and the system. Nothing else. 

I hate it when a man stares at me as if I am a public object on display.
I hate it when a man tries to touch me with whatever reason he can think of.
I hate it when a man gropes me in a crowd leaving me feeling violated of my personal space.
Every woman does.

These so called incidents happen everywhere. On the roads, at public places, at an acquaintance's place, at schools, colleges, public transport, theatres, railway stations, and every other place you can think of or you be to. You will find them as auto drivers, newspaper boys, dhobi wala, or even the exam invigilator you hand over your answer sheet to, trying to just touch you in the faintest ways and areas possible.

I am no exception either, but guess the only concession I got to have is that I never faced any violence or brutality to any degree. Should I feel fortunate to have only been subjected to peaceful molestation like staring, groping, abusive verbal advances etc.? How about these incidents? One cannot report such incidents anywhere because they would not have any evidence to prove that a man has violated their personal space and privacy. Nobody will buy this argument and it will be turned down as one of those common incidents that have been happening from a long time, from the time man first desired a woman. It may not mean anything to anybody, but it means a lot to women who feel violated and subjected to such unwanted and forceful advances. How are we going to change all of this? No law can.


Where are morals when we, the civilized and urban face of India, too make, accept and celebrate Sheila ki jawani, Munni ki badnami and Fevicol se judi woman calling herself Tandoori chicken? All this under the guise of freedom of expression. What are we passing on to our future generations? And, we talk about educating others on gender sensitivity and change in society. SHAME

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